Ronnie Knew How to Pick Them!

Here's a wonderful article about how crabby Supreme Court justices can be! Oh, how true that can be. . . I'm a show biz person, so I guess I naturally gravitated to the show biz guests at our parties, like John Travolta and Princess Diana -- oh, if she hadn't crashed into that tunnel wall in Paris and he hadn't been so homosexual, I really think they might have hit it off and become a lovely couple!

Anyway, all of the justices would just stand in the corner at our parties, giving everyone else dirty looks. And I was always so proud of Ronnie for picking Sandra O'Connor, because even though she was a bit rough around the edges -- she once told Ron Jr. that he should man up and work a ranch for a while -- she knew how to have a good time. She once told me her hand felt empty without a glass of scotch!

I couldn't find a picture of the three of us, so I just sort of made a collage!

Just Say No To Smoking

Well, this is lovely. So many of my Hollywood friends died from lung diseases. And of course, my dear friend and clothier Bill Blass died of throat cancer. How many more dress makers have to die before we take smoking prevention seriously?

You're Right, Maureen!

Maureen Dowd is a former burlesque performer who now writes witty little flourishes for the New York Times. Ronnie would always complain about the New York Times, and said that it didn't like us. But I always said, if it weren't for the New York Times, where would Bill Blass be, and if it weren't for Bill Blass, I would be naked!

Anyway, here is Maureen writing about President Obama and his going to Broadway plays and museums in Paris. It looks like all these people are upset because they think that it's too expensive for the President to do things like take his wife to a depressing August Wilson play (I met August Wilson once -- he was lovely, not at all like Tennessee Williams).

Well, you know, I think that's just silly, and I agree with Maureen. We're America, and first of all when I was in the White House it cost taxpayers a small mint if I sneezed in the wrong direction, so it really can't be avoided. And secondly, what is our president supposed to do? Sit at home and watch reruns of "Highway to Heaven?"

Of course, I did know Michael Landon rather well -- I thought he was about as attractive as you could be when he was on Bonanza -- but apparently the fame went to his head, which is something you've got to really guard against.

And they said Ronnie was dumb!

Apparently, people are still interested in this woman. You know, she reminds me of all those young women the studio would take under contract, and you would just think to yourself, you can break her jaw, you can give her posture lessons, you can shove pills down her throat until she's as skinny as an inch worm. . . . she's still just a dumb girl from Osh-Kosh trying to scrub the farm dirt out from between her legs!

Angela in Blithe Spirit

My dear friend Angela Lansbury, who we nicknamed "Old Hag" back in our studio days, won the Tony Award for best supporting actress for her role in Blithe Spirit. I couldn't be happier for her! It's always gratifying to see people who didn't have the opportunity to be first ladies still manage to make something out of themselves!

Blithe Spirit makes me think of Noel Coward. I went on several dates with him, but then I realized he was madly homosexual. You can't make a silk purse out of a silk ascot!

Still Auditioning!

Look at this: three young men won the Tony award for best actor, all of them sharing the role in that movie turned musical about gay boy from Scotland who dances. My goodness, can you imagine if Elizabeth Taylor had to share an award with Lauren Bacall and Debbie Reynolds! Of course, they're all so fat now, maybe they would be happy just to have someone love them.

I still read all the new scripts that are being considered for Broadway, hoping there will be a role for me so I can finally win my Tony. Unfortunately, I don't play hookers or exotic dancers, so it's really slim pickings!

I'm awake now!

You may have seen me in some of the recent news reels, visiting the White House and having lunch with Michelle Obama, and maybe you wondered, why hasn't Nancy been blogging?!?

Well, the truth is, in order to get ready for a big public appearance like that, I have to do several months of Sweedish sleep therapy, which is nearly as restful and restorative as some of the comas I have had!

But now I'm awake!

Isn't that Michelle Obama something? She's exactly like me but black and physically imposing!

Peggy Noonan was also there! She used to hide behind the pillars the White House when she heard me coming! I liked that Peggy!